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Two sides to everything

I guess before I even leave for China I should really voice out this. So conflicting until I am pretty lost sometimes. At least this is what bothers me to the very max everyday. No matter how pressurizing other things are, they mean NOTHING to me. So let me force this out of my mind so that I go Beijing in peace.

1) See2 (Made me see stars for 2 years, so I might be pretty biased here, just a strong warning, u might rage)

The Highlight of this post. I consider this the most controversial event in the more “recent” times of Ec3. I honestly think its destructive power its way stronger than its constructive power. Imagine getting yourself involved in an event which you have no idea what on the Earth it is. If not for the CIP hours, I could just dao it altogether in Sec 1.

Ok thats part 1. How about the ability to destroy 2 batches of juniors? (My batch and the Sec 2s).  You might argue that I survive out of such miserable times (when self training is like the world) but what about the many others who don’t? If we were actually adults I wouldn’t be complaining about this. But we aren’t, people need guidance up still a certain point in life, and I do not believe the point is at Sec 1.

Ok wait. Only after Day 1 did I get the whole idea of See2, its either I lag or no one is informed. So I not going to say so much about this. Yes, even if I really am the first one to even try implementing a proposal from See2, the success rate isn’t going to be high from what I see, and I am actually feeling guilty about implementing it, since it would waste lots of precious time if the trainings were not appreciated by the trainees, which I strongly believe could be put to better use.

Well the only few parts constructive is not happening. I was thinking that See2 is actually an extremely good platform for students to actually interact with many different personalities and actually handling all of them. What I see mainly is people interacting with the people who actually fit their personalities, thereby forming various cliques. I am fond of clique hopping so in the end I get to know a lot of ppl, after all See2 its good at expanding social network. Oh wellz I shan’t further comment anymore. If I do so going to have fire liao. You iz probably going to ask: why you be a fac? My reply would be very good question. Nevertheless, I must still say my cofac is good ^^ (ok same for others lol =) , so no comments about this plz).

2) Club (Again bias is inside, I am expecting open fire here)

Yes if you have read part 1, this is the reason wai I prefer sticking around with my juniors, which haz become another source of my main worry. I see a lot of hope in the Sec 1s, just that hopefully they grow up someday, I dnoz I find them a little playful at times. If you are reading this Sec 1s erm, I guess I really used a lot of patience with you guys =) But still I must complement that u guys are very hardworking, jyjy!

Well for the Sec 2s, I have been searching very long to find someone to replace me. I have in mind a Sec 1, but someone needs the fill the 1 year gap. Yes I know you have been neglected for quite a while when you were Sec 1 and started very very very very very very very late (the reason why I actually know your batch very well). I know that some of you can learn by yourself, and that you guys are actually quite busy to be honest, but hopefully you put some of your time in areas where you should be too. I have tried everything on your batch but nothing seems to work. You guys need to pick up, I hope you realize the importance, I have nothing else much to say. 1 more thing, plz take the initiative to talk to the sec 1s =)

Haiz my batch 50% of the people missing, usually left the Exco (complete or not another question). Mm plz don’t set a bad example or distract juniors (like play pokemon, which specifically refers to yyc). And here comes me. Firstly, I would like to reiterate for the >100th time that I am not pro, so even though I try to upgrade myself at times there is a limit as to what I can teach and do, and when it comes to admin stuff I am quite fail to be honest. I shall create a few packages like the one I did for PHP before I go, and to juniors reading please respect yyc during training times. He is after all more capable than me in web. After that erm, well I don’t know wad u guys are up to.

3) Defence Science

Ok I hope Mr Tan is not reading this, but honestly I have not much interest into the “Defence” Part. At least I won’t want to specialize in that field unless left with no choice. Not sure how long a DS Rep I am going to be, but as long as I still am, then I am going to be sent for everything. Yes I appreciate the exposure, but sorry I don’t believe I am going to achieve 安居乐业 if I work in that sector. In fact, I would not even feel like working as a programmer despite doing so now. I rather join the science or teaching sector, more fun and more slack.

 

Final comments for this post:

I think this is one very very very open and literal post. If you have browsed through all the rest of my posts you would realise I comment on absolutely nothing to indicate anything explicit, in particular to avoid fire. I am pretty sure you would not have seen some sides of me if you were involved in any of the 3 topics above. This is the first and probably the last time I am going to make such an explicit post which invites fire from a lot of people. I just hope you don’t flame me too much, this is really my true thoughts.

While u might be burning in rage, I will be freezing in Beijing quite soon (7 Dec), so I hope you do simmer down while I try and warm myself up there. Open to all constructive criticisms and comments. Sorry if I did cause rage, really sorry, If I don’t write this I am going to rage myself.

Priority Kill

How I wonder what the above means.

How easy it is to forget stuff, most are sorted according the importance or deadlines.

Different people I guess are cared about different things all at the same time, I know.

But throwing 100% effort to everything involved is the real challenge.

People like me is a perfect example of failure to accomplish to above.

The only 2 regrets of Sec 3: failure to provide utmost dedication and failure in StrITwise (yr after 我不干了).

=(

I really hate Art and Craft and Design, and at this point in time not many people can quite stop me.

Not to complain but erm, Sometimes when you fight a war you run out of bullets, and then u try to melee with the only image in your mind being death.

Once again, its impossible to force 2 completely different tracks to meet. Not when multiple random tracks come crashing into you.

I am being very naise already. If you do not realize, I will never do anything no matter wad urgency for most stuff on my birthday. Just be thankful I do every other time.

I will just bear with it until I go Beijing. The snow there can numb my feelings, for 40 days, at least.

Processors

Get a Core 2 Quad (my desktop, wadever) to sub me plz. I don’t like processing so many different information at once. Somehow I have a feeling people trouble comes knocking mostly on my door.

Yes, shut the door and you miss all the opportunities. Its like your processor refusing to process your work. I am open to criticisms, not disturbance at the wrong time.

Most people find it difficult to kill time during the holidays. I find it difficult to find time to kill during the holidays. The most I do is dojorush a few missions in ra3 uprising, which takes < 1/2 hour a day, when I am pissed off with robocode.

The reason I lead my life quite unhappily these few days is because I lead life like how a processor survives when there is no power, and amazingly it overclocks.

Pretty hard to hype(cheer) me up now. basically 1 word is written: sian.

 

 

 

Birthdays :)

At least yesterday was the first day I typed a smiley face for ~1-2 months or so, so that goes to show I am happy yesterday :D Other than the fail candle that can’t withstand my breath, erm I guess the rest was pretty much ok.

Sorry in case you have not realised I always dao ECCube on my birthday every year. Other than that I will be around ;)

Honestly I thank you for your birthday wishes, as in you have realised I commented on every wish to me. Heres the tally of results for the past 1 day, excluding MSN from abt 20 ppl:

Untitled

Just a quick update, I have definitely certain days free during my hols. If you want to help me burn it meaningfully and fruifully, please feel free to contact me =)

Dates: 8 Nov, 16-17 Nov, 20 Nov,  28-29 Nov, 5-6 Dec (As you can see YDSP just owned the See2 Chalet :P )

 

If my calculations are correct I should have successfully burned away the holidays before it even starts.

Honestly, I am rather sad now because there is no F1 in Robocode. I have honestly no interest in any competition anymore. The demand is too high to be met, or rather I have no interest in meeting it.

I will not do SGCC, Robocode  after Sec 4. If no one is learning from me, I am not going to teach after Sec 4.

Back to the 2am sleep times again? Lets see about that. I am better off with 3S1 (or 4S1 nxt year) than EC3 it seems.

Edit: That sounds like I got 忧郁症. Haiz.

Rage

I think there has been enough kerosene spread over the floor I guess. My compartments are getting a little bit flooded with it.

Here’s the problem: If I tell the problem, its like 1) pointing a gun at myself and 2) the whole world go boomz (tsk fragments, shrapnel, etc. tsk)

There seem to be very very few people I can tell this to who can help me. I can obviously tell all those who can’t help me and not involved in the problem. But if things are not working out as it should, a little extra “gift” will be given by me.

Bottling is dumb. Forced bottling is fate. You know, the best bottle is the milk bottle, its very cute and reminds you of your childhood memories.  (tsk. hint again, I hate keeping this). The next is your water bottle, it is very good for hydration levels (think of other uses lol)

You know me. There is always calm, so you can’t tell if its before the storm.

days is all that I have to slack after exams?

+4 days to do robocode,  /2 days for programming,  x3 days to see^2,  x5 days to go beijing?

You know when I get angry the most. 1) thing is NOT DONE. 2) I am accused. 3) BOTH

If no one is doing it or wants to do it, tell me, I know the world is harsh, I will do it.

I really hate soloing. Wai the world forcing me to do this?

Cos I am dumb. get it? Now scram. who disturbs my peace any further gets hell from me.

孤独一人

When you realise that no one can help you in a certain topic, you start wondering a lot of things.

(The above in particular specfically means robocode, my father was telling me this was for inventors)

At the moment of high, it is accompanied with a low. (If you get what this mean you are really good)

You know, the shade beneath the coconut tree is very appealing.

Similarly, places that do not exist are very appealing too.

lol

ok exams ovar. really that yay? Not so lol.

current status –> installz. crackz. boomz. bangz. pew pew.

My life in hci is like coding study coding study. nonono that’s not going to be where I am going to limit myself to.

Next year I shall go on suicide mission. Its called science research+service learning (maybe) + ds research (compulsory).

Well I wouldn’t mind u asking me to go for outings if I am free. Just one condition: no skateboarding/roller blading/cycling. Sorry But I am nub at the above and have no interest in improving myself in those areas for now.

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